The Gay Monogamy Coach.

Monogamy after the apps. Part one - The conditioned response.

Alan Cox Season 5 Episode 1

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0:00 | 14:22

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Monogamy After the Apps — Part One: The conditioned response.
The Gay Monogamy Coach · Alan Cox.

This is the first of three episodes drawn from a body of work called Monogamy After the Apps. Part one begins where most men don't think to look: the conditioned response. What the apps have done to your nervous system — not your morals, not your character, but the part of you that reaches for the phone before you've had a conscious thought about it.

We examine the variable ratio reinforcement schedule that sits beneath the swipe, the dopamine of pursuit versus the absence of fulfilment, and the three signs that the conditioning has migrated into your real-life interactions: the impatience, the drop, and the confusion of attention with interest. The episode closes with a single diagnostic question — when was the last time you sat with a man without looking at your phone?

If you're a gay man who has been running this loop long enough to mistake it for your personality, this episode names the mechanism so you can begin to interrupt it.

Support the show: patreon.com/empoweringgaymen
Email: empoweringgaymen@gmail.com
Website: lifecoachingempoweringgaymen.com

Support the show

Monogamy After the Apps — Part One: The conditioned response.
The Gay Monogamy Coach · Alan Cox.

This is the first of three episodes drawn from a body of work called Monogamy After the Apps. Part one begins where most men don't think to look: the conditioned response. What the apps have done to your nervous system — not your morals, not your character, but the part of you that reaches for the phone before you've had a conscious thought about it.

We examine the variable ratio reinforcement schedule that sits beneath the swipe, the dopamine of pursuit versus the absence of fulfilment, and the three signs that the conditioning has migrated into your real-life interactions: the impatience, the drop, and the confusion of attention with interest. The episode closes with a single diagnostic question — when was the last time you sat with a man without looking at your phone?

If you're a gay man who has been running this loop long enough to mistake it for your personality, this episode names the mechanism so you can begin to interrupt it.

Support the show: patreon.com/empoweringgaymen
Email: empoweringgaymen@gmail.com
Website: lifecoachingempoweringgaymen.com